Barbara (Parfinski) Kalafat (June 20, 1940 – October 29, 2024)
On June 20th, 1940, Barbara was born to Walter and Rachel Parfinski of Niagara Falls, NY. She was born the fourth of eight children. She was blessed with a rare beauty, intelligence and a dry, witty sense of humor. Raised with traditional values, Barbara was expected to marry and settle down once she graduated from high school but she longed for independence and a bit of adventure.
In 1964, Barbara and a girlfriend declared their independence and headed west never looking back. They made it all the way to Las Vegas, NV and it was on their first day in Vegas, Barbara met the man who would later become her husband. Being as beautiful as she was, Barbara had her choice of suitors, but Tom was the one who won her heart. Not long after meeting, the couple married and settled in Las Vegas. The marriage was stormy but they managed to have two daughters whom they both loved very much. In 1975, the family moved to Great Falls, MT where Tom was born and raised.
Tom and Barbara fought to stay together for over ten years before accepting they were better apart. The divorce, however, did not end their relationship as they worked together to raise their two daughters. She was also very close to her father-in-law, who loved her like a daughter. Over those many years, Tom and Barbara were able to move their relationship from hurt, to a place of acceptance and love for each other. Near the end of her life, tender words were shared and hurts forgiven.
Barbara loved her two daughters with all her heart and she supported them with everything she had to offer. Those early years were filled with laughter and tears, hardships and challenges, but love was always at the center and somehow, that was enough. Her daughters attended and graduated from college, a dream Barbara wanted to come true. Once her daughters were grown, Barbara went back to school and became a Certified Nursing Assistant working mostly with the elderly. She truly enjoyed this work and took great pride in caring for her residents and giving them the loving care they deserved. She had a tremendous work ethic which she gave to her daughters. She retired at age 70 from Sam’s Club where she befriended many fellow workers and customers.
Both of her daughters married and at the age of 59, Barbara was blessed with a grandson. She adored her grandson and spoiled him endlessly. Her dedication was so great, both her daughters often joked about being glad they didn’t have a brother as it was pretty obvious how they would’ve ranked next to him. Mom would laugh and shake her head ‘no’ when we said this, but we knew.
Not long after retiring, Barbara was diagnosed with Parkinson’s Disease. A cruel and debilitating illness that slowly robbed her of her vitality, and eventually, her life.
Looking back over the years, we see her life was not big or glamorous but instead small and humble. She deserved better but never asked for more. She was content with the hand she had been dealt and made the most of it. She loved and was loved in return and in the end, she passed peacefully in her sleep at home with her family beside her.
Mom blessed us with many values, talents and traditions which we will lovingly carry forward. May God love and keep her until we see her again.
Barbara was preceded in death by her parents, Walter and Rachel Parfinski, brother John Parfinski, sister Jeannette McCoy, her father-in-law, Nick Kalafat, and Brother-in-law and Sister-in-law, Ron and Kathy Kalafat. She is survived by her siblings, Patty Quandt, Thelma McPherson, Bruce, Gary and Greg Parfinski, ex-husband Thomas Kalafat, daughters Nancy Donovan (Patrick Coley) and Julie Bass, her grandson, Bram Donovan (Chloe Parker), and numerous nephews, nieces, and cousins.
A Celebration of Life is planned for Saturday, November 30th, 2024 @ 2:30pm. The celebration will be held at the Kalafat homestead located at 4112 Tri-Hill Frontage Road.
Author: Staff
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